Brain Vs. Mind Pt. 2

Jonathan Grubbs • Associate Pastor
October 6, 2026

3 Minute Read

Brain Vs. Mind # 2: From Reality to a Plan

Dr. Lee Warren's framework begins by helping us distinguish between the subjective, the objective, and ultimately the possible. In other words:

  • What do I feel?
  • What is actually true?
  • What could be true going forward?

That distinction is powerful because our feelings can be incredibly convincing. If my subjective assessment is, "Nothing ever goes the way I need it to," it can feel like an objective description of my life. But then I write down the objective reality:

  • I've had successes.
  • People love me.
  • God has been faithful.

There are things in my life that are genuinely good. I'm struggling right now, but struggling is not the same thing as having a hopeless life. And something begins to change. The exercise itself can bring a measure of relief. But we shouldn't stop there. Once we've distinguished the subjective from the objective, we need to assess what we've discovered and develop an action plan. That is where I want to go next.

Assessment Before Action

Naming reality accurately already begins to loosen the grip of our most troubling thoughts. When I say, "Nothing ever goes the way I need it to," and then force myself to look honestly at the evidence, I may discover that the statement simply isn't true. But that doesn't mean my underlying struggle isn't real.

The anxiety is real. The grief is real. The exhaustion is real. The relationship may genuinely be difficult. The diagnosis may be real. The circumstances may actually be painful. Objective truth doesn't require us to pretend that everything is fine. It simply prevents the subjective experience from becoming the whole story. That distinction is crucial. The goal isn't positive thinking. The goal is truthful thinking. And once we have a clearer picture of reality, we can ask the next question: Given what is actually happening, what should I do next? That's the assessment and action plan.

Why Hope Comes First

This is also where the connection to our Soul Care Ministry update comes in.

Volume Two of the How We Endure Series in Sessions of Hope will draw heavily from two of Dr. Warren's books: Hope Is the First Dose and Self-Brain Surgery.

The first title may be my favorite book title of all time. Hope Is the First Dose. My whole life is built around hope. My ministry is built around hope. And I think there is something profoundly Christian about beginning there.

Dr. Warren's Hope Is the First Dose is more memoir-like, using his own story to explore what hope means in the midst of suffering. Self-Brain Surgery, by contrast, focuses more directly on the mechanics. Warren writes as a brain surgeon and someone deeply familiar with neuropsychology and the way the brain functions. He also brings his faith into the conversation, exploring how science, faith, and an understanding of the brain can work together to help people become happier, healthier, and more whole.

Because these ideas are becoming part of a future Sessions of Hope course, I want to process them here as I work through them. That's one of the reasons I write in the first place. I like to think through things on paper, and I like to share that thinking with you. We're taking these ideas out of the abstract and asking what they mean for real people, real struggles, and the very real cases that people are facing here at Church by the Sea. We've started by separating what we feel from what is true.

Now we're ready for the next step: assessment and action plan.

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From this Collection: Blog
October 8, 2026 • 9 Minute Read
Soul Care Ministry Update - End of 2026
As we enter the final quarter of the year, it feels like the right time to share an update on where things are headed with Church by the Sea’s Soul Care Ministry. There are two main components to this New Ministry: Stonger Still: Spiritual Direction (Formerly Biblical Counseling) & Sessions of Hope The Nomenclature: From Biblical Counseling to Spiritual Direction I've spent the past several years learning what my strengths and limitations are when it comes to counseling. I knew that stepping into counseling after my education & previous experience would reveal both areas of expertise and areas where I still need to grow. What I've come to realize is that the term counseling is probably too broad—and perhaps too clinical—for what I am actually called to do. Though I’ve had a Spiritual Director myself for the past five years, I’ve gone back and forth on whether or not to use the term for the Stonger Still Practice. It’s not as well-known a term, and it seems to carry an air of ‘control’ However, Spiritual Direction isn’t about someone directing you in a commanding sort of way. It’s a term that dates back to the 3rd and 4th Century Christians and is more about Directing the attention. In show biz, a ringmaster or magician might say something like, “May I direct your attention to ...” As the Spiritual Director, I observe, share, and maybe point you toward things in your heart and life you were standing too close to, so you can see them clearly on your own. The other reason for the switch is that ... I have a deep appreciation for psychology, psychiatry, and clinical work, particularly when they are thoughtfully integrated with a biblical worldview ... and Counseling might accidentally lead someone to believe (accidentally) that they are receiving care from a licensed mental health professional. My vocational calling is Pastoral ... I am more a Shepherd and Spiritual Guide than a clinician. For the past five years, I've worked with a Spiritual Director, and that language has increasingly helped me understand what I believe I'm actually doing. Historically, the concept is much closer to companionship or spiritual friendship: walking alongside another person, helping them pay attention to God, themselves, and what is happening in their lives. I've sometimes described this simply as "One-Anothering." The lead Director is the Holy Spirit. That's much closer to the ministry I want to build. So Stronger Still will gradually move away from using Biblical Counseling as its primary label and toward Spiritual Direction. You can learn more about Spiritual Direction at this FAQ This doesn't mean that the substance of what people experience will suddenly be different. If you've participated in this ministry, you already know what it looks like: someone walking alongside you as you navigate frustration, grief, despair, confusion, and the ordinary difficulties of life. The terminology matters primarily because it helps me establish appropriate boundaries, and is rooted in the History of the Christian Church. Knowing When to Refer Our referral network has become such an important part of this ministry. For a while, we've had Carita, a psychologist, and Payton, a licensed marriage and family therapist. Since then, we've added Katrina with Surfside Therapy, as well as Hope Greeno, who will specifically work with children and youth. I'm also continuing to develop relationships with other therapists and mental-health professionals, including people connected with neuropsychology. My first mentor at Church by the Sea, Dr. Dave Ruth, has also been an important part of this story. He is a Pastoral Counselor and what I would call a true-blue Biblical Counselor, with particular gifts in helping marriages find their footing. From now on, I will refer many Marriages to him, though some will go to Payton. My hope is that helping individuals become more connected to God on their own can have a residual effect on their marriages. My wife, Suellen, and I have learned over the years that becoming more tender and gentle with one another often starts with each of us becoming more connected to God on our own. That's the lane I want to stay in for the foreseeable future. Sessions of Hope We've now piloted what were originally called Volumes One through Four of Sessions of Hope. As we've developed the program, we've learned a great deal simply by doing it. Because the long-term vision is for this to become something scalable and potentially useful in other churches, we've been willing to adjust the structure as we go. One of the biggest changes is the way we're organizing the curriculum. Rather than simply moving from Volume One to Volume Two to Volume Three and so forth, Sessions of Hope will be organized into four different series: How We Heal How We Endure How We Love How We Grow So far, we've completed Volume One in each of those four categories. Going forward, we'll develop Volume Two, Volume Three, and so on within each category. This makes the curriculum much easier to navigate. Rather than assuming that everyone needs to follow the same sequence, people can look at the four major areas and choose the material that best fits what they are experiencing. The first two categories are particularly connected to mental health and may naturally draw people who are looking for help in those areas. Recovery material will also fit within those categories. For example, material related to the Twelve Steps will fall under How We Endure. The goal is becoming less about creating a series of classes that I personally teach and more about building a curriculum that the church can use. Multiplying the Ministry Next year, we'll have four new Sessions of Hope courses. But I have another goal: I want at least one new facilitator to take one of the existing courses, use the facilitator guide, and teach it independently. That would be a significant proof of concept. It would show that Sessions of Hope doesn't have to depend entirely on me. We could eventually have multiple courses happening simultaneously, led by different people, and the curriculum could become part of the broader catalog available to Small-Group & Bible Study Leaders. That's the direction I want to see. Pastors are people too. I'm not fundamentally different from anyone else, and I don't want this ministry to depend on the idea that I possess some unique spark that nobody else has. In fact, something beautiful is already happening: some of the people I've counseled are now helping me. They're helping me think through work-life balance, health, and how to make this ministry sustainable. The relationship is becoming a two-way street. Some of my directees have helped me as much as I've helped them ... and sometimes I wonder if they haven't helped me more. That makes me wonder: if people can facilitate something like Recovering from the Losses of Life or Rhythms of Grace for themselves, why couldn't trained laypeople also provide a basic level of Spiritual Direction? Nine times out of ten, people just need someone to listen, pray, and respond. That shouldn't have to be limited to one or two Pastors. And so eventually, I want to clearly define what lay spiritual direction looks like and what the boundaries of lay counseling and lay spiritual direction should be. Those boundaries will matter. A lay director should know when they have reached the end of their capacity. Referrals need to be easy, and the process should minimize the sense of rejection that can come when someone realizes they need a different kind of help. The message shouldn't be, "I can't help you." It should be, "I'm going to stay with you while we connect you with the right person." That will also require better screening. When an intake form comes into the office, it needs to be reviewed appropriately so that we're not handing a volunteer more than they can responsibly carry. If something is particularly heavy, it should be clear that the lay director's role may simply be to listen and provide companionship while we arrange the appropriate professional referral. I've had situations recently where I've wondered whether simply connecting someone with somebody—even if my schedule didn't allow me to see them—might have bridged a dangerous gap. It might even have saved a life. You have the potential to save a life simply by being willing to listen. And this doesn't require everyone to commit to an enormous workload. Because this is a volunteer ministry, someone might be able to meet with one person once a month. That's enough to make a difference. We can share the burden. You would also be able to refuse a case based on your own triggers For example, one of our referral counselors has personally experienced addiction-related loss in their family. Because of that history, we won't refer people struggling with addiction to that particular counselor. Boundaries like that are part of building a healthy ministry. The goal isn't to make everyone capable of helping everyone. The goal is to make sure that more people are capable of helping someone. The Future of Soul Care This is where the ministry is headed: Sessions of Hope taught by multiple facilitators, Spiritual Direction as the new language for what was formerly our Biblical Counseling ministry. Down the road, we'll also develop a formal training course for our Spiritual Direction ministry. I do believe we can eventually accredit the training for a first generation of Lay Directors. This training will give people greater confidence about where they're coming from, what they are equipped to do, and where their boundaries lie. It will also give the church greater clarity and credibility about how the ministry operates. That is the rebrand. More importantly, it is the transition from a soft launch into a fully developed Soul-Care ministry at Church by the Sea.

Jonathan Grubbs

Associate Pastor

Currently Reading
October 6, 2026 • 4 Minute Read
Brain Vs. Mind Pt. 2
Brain Vs. Mind # 2: From Reality to a Plan Dr. Lee Warren's framework begins by helping us distinguish between the subjective, the objective, and ultimately the possible. In other words: What do I feel? What is actually true? What could be true going forward? That distinction is powerful because our feelings can be incredibly convincing. If my subjective assessment is, "Nothing ever goes the way I need it to," it can feel like an objective description of my life. But then I write down the objective reality: I've had successes. People love me. God has been faithful. There are things in my life that are genuinely good. I'm struggling right now, but struggling is not the same thing as having a hopeless life. And something begins to change. The exercise itself can bring a measure of relief. But we shouldn't stop there. Once we've distinguished the subjective from the objective, we need to assess what we've discovered and develop an action plan. That is where I want to go next. Assessment Before Action Naming reality accurately already begins to loosen the grip of our most troubling thoughts. When I say, "Nothing ever goes the way I need it to," and then force myself to look honestly at the evidence, I may discover that the statement simply isn't true. But that doesn't mean my underlying struggle isn't real. The anxiety is real. The grief is real. The exhaustion is real. The relationship may genuinely be difficult. The diagnosis may be real. The circumstances may actually be painful. Objective truth doesn't require us to pretend that everything is fine. It simply prevents the subjective experience from becoming the whole story. That distinction is crucial. The goal isn't positive thinking. The goal is truthful thinking. And once we have a clearer picture of reality, we can ask the next question: Given what is actually happening, what should I do next? That's the assessment and action plan. Why Hope Comes First This is also where the connection to our Soul Care Ministry update comes in. Volume Two of the How We Endure Series in Sessions of Hope will draw heavily from two of Dr. Warren's books: Hope Is the First Dose and Self-Brain Surgery. The first title may be my favorite book title of all time. Hope Is the First Dose. My whole life is built around hope. My ministry is built around hope. And I think there is something profoundly Christian about beginning there. Dr. Warren's Hope Is the First Dose is more memoir-like, using his own story to explore what hope means in the midst of suffering. Self-Brain Surgery, by contrast, focuses more directly on the mechanics. Warren writes as a brain surgeon and someone deeply familiar with neuropsychology and the way the brain functions. He also brings his faith into the conversation, exploring how science, faith, and an understanding of the brain can work together to help people become happier, healthier, and more whole. Because these ideas are becoming part of a future Sessions of Hope course, I want to process them here as I work through them. That's one of the reasons I write in the first place. I like to think through things on paper, and I like to share that thinking with you. We're taking these ideas out of the abstract and asking what they mean for real people, real struggles, and the very real cases that people are facing here at Church by the Sea. We've started by separating what we feel from what is true. Now we're ready for the next step: assessment and action plan.

Jonathan Grubbs

Associate Pastor

September 22, 2026 • 3 Minute Read
Brain vs. Me
I got a little behind on my writing for you all between sessions, including my Tuesday Tidbits, Wednesday Wisdom, and Faith Fridays. We had some of my wife’s family in town from Brazil for Zoe’s eighth birthday! Even with the busy house, I managed to send the first installment in a new series. I believe it applies to all of us walking alongside each other in this new Soul Care Ministry. The core concept comes from Dr. Lee Warren, a Christian neurosurgeon. It starts by acknowledging that our brain is malleable, meaning we do not have to let it command our true selves. In other words, you have a brain, but you are not your brain. This principle allows us to step back from what is happening to us when our brain gets stuck in survival mode. Warren drew on his own PTSD from his time in Iraq. At a certain point, he realized his brain was telling him he was still in danger when he was actually safe. He developed a process using surgical metaphors to excise unwanted synapses and replace them with a newer, truer narrative. That sounds a lot like the Apostle Paul: "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind." My goal is to distill his worksheet and make it more practical for everyone. Some of us navigate ADHD or other forms of neurodivergence. Some of us try to change our partner's behavior before looking in the mirror. Others are trying to break the chains of long-standing habits and disorders we no longer wish to carry, or escape complexes handed to us by parents, bullies, or past trauma. I believe the pattern for confronting these struggles is largely universal. We will all mutually benefit, myself included, as we walk through it together. So, where do we begin? Grab a piece of paper, a journal, or a notes app, and list your chief complaints. (Chief Complaints is a medical term for charting. In this case it’s areas our Soul is wounded. Addiction, relationships, etc.) Write down the subjective aspects of those complaints. These are things like, "I feel bad about myself," or "There aren’t enough hours in the day." It is the complainy stuff, the brain static version of the situation. Next, write down objective truths you have learned from faith: "I am beloved." "Thoughts can become things, but I am not my thoughts." "The idea that others have it better is an assumption, not a fact." The following step involves an assessment and a plan. For now, however, I want us simply to sit with the comparison. Look at what our brain defaults to as an organism primed for survival over thriving, contrasted with what we know to be true in this season where we have faith, community, and a lot to be grateful for. Just sit with that contrast. I’ll be back with part two.

Jonathan Grubbs

Associate Pastor

September 19, 2026 • 4 Minute Read
The Obstacle is the Way
One thing we all share is that our hearts and heads are not exactly where we would like them to be. Here are some things that seem to come up over and over again in the counseling environment: - “It feels as though it’s one thing after another.” - “I know I should love myself, but I don’t.” - “It’s easier to care for others than it is to care for myself.” Then there’s the positive. Even as we express these struggles, we're aware of our progress. This is when we recognize how far we have come, even as we still want to grow more. This is a hopeful place but still very much a place of disillusionment. Here’s the long and the short of it... We're each finding ourselves stuck in thinking patterns and ways of being and speaking that we want to change. And I think we’re honing in on that simple question. Could I change my thinking for the better? Could I dare to believe in better things, better days, etc. Marcus Aurelius reiterated something from the book of James about trials. He didn’t know he was espousing Christian values, but he was... specifically when he said “The Obstacle is the way.” (This is in line with James 1:2-4) The first step to getting better is embracing failure and suffering. Sound counterintuitive? Let me explain. Here’s the classic loop: - We want to do better; we try to do better; we do... but imperfectly, and then sometimes we don’t. Add to that unexpected ER visits, the IRS, cancer, natural disasters, hurts, habits, hang-ups... and the odds start to feel stacked against our success. But when “the obstacle is the way,” or as James says, “our trials become all joy,” the odds look better because these things no longer become interruptions to growth, but fertilizer. Now you’re probably following me so far but asking yourself... how? How can I change my brain to think in such a very counterintuitive way? The answer is something I believe I’m closing in on, but the basic concept is awakening to a very cool reality: your youness and your brain are two different things. When God says to love Him with all your heart, mind, and soul, the Hebrew word for soul there is nephesh. It’s essentially your youness. I’m Jonny not because of the neurons firing in my brain; they are physiological byproducts of being part of the human species. And if I can interrupt my thinking long enough for my nephesh to tell my brain it’s not in charge, your brain will actually change, and over time it will become more natural to live from a place of “The Obstacle is the way.” I’m listening to a book right now by Christian neurosurgeon Lee Warren. Cool story about God confirming this book as part of the DNA of Sessions of Hope and Stronger Still Biblical Counseling, but that’s for another time. What I aim to do is pare down his journaling/self-brain surgery resources to make them as turnkey as possible for our context. The context of you and me walking alongside each other to get better and take control of our brains. But start by separating your own failure and the bad stuff that happens to you from what you have to think. Your brain will fill in the gaps based on physiology and fight-or-flight dynamics, but that doesn't have to be the final word. When the brain spits out a story of panic, re-story it into a foe your mission is to vanquish. And please don't mistake this for “the power of positive thinking.” I'll go into more details, but for now just know this framework will be all about neuroscience and Paul’s idea of taking every thought captive. So let's start there. Separate the negative spillover of the pink thing in your skull from you. God made you in His image. The Gospel brings out a deeper you that is better than those knee-jerk thoughts. Bibliography Aurelius, Marcus. Meditations. Translated by Martin Hammond, Penguin Books, 2006. (Regarding the philosophical parallel of reframing obstacles, specifically Book 5, Section 20: "The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.") Warren, Lee. Hope is the First Dose: A Treatment Plan for Recovering from Trauma, Tragedy, and Other Massive Things. WaterBrook, 2023. The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. ESV Bible Systems, 2001 (inclusive of James 1:2–4 regarding counting trials as joy). Family Life Radio // Hope is the First Dose // W. Lee Warren (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI6vRGzruQY) This video provides an insightful discussion with Dr. Lee Warren on applying the principles of neuroplasticity and faith to re-story our minds through trauma and hardship.

Jonathan Grubbs

Associate Pastor

June 17, 2026 • 6 Minute Read
Exile
Living in Exile: Hope, Identity, and Resisting Babylon We all live in exile. If it often feels like you don't belong in this world as it is, it's because you don't. In 1 Peter 2:9–12, believers are called "temporary residents and foreigners" warned to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against our soul. To understand what it means for a Christian to live in exile, we have to grasp its history. The ancient Israelites found themselves conquered by Babylon, living in exile far from their homeland. Surprisingly, even when they finally traveled back, the prophets continued to refer to them as exiles because they were home, but not really. They were still ruled by oppressive empires and trapped in the same corrupt ways. Because of this, exile became a spiritual reality and an archetype—a universal symbol for alienation and a longing for something more. In the Bible, exile is the human condition until Christ returns. We are sojourners in a foreign land longing for a better home. Jesus of Nazareth wandered without a home, announcing a great restoration and promising in John 14:2, "In my Father's house there are many rooms." Until that day, Peter gives us core principles for navigating our current reality ... namely that ... What we hope for is what we live for. To live in the light of God's presence, we must live like God exists and live in the light of Jesus' return. Here are the three precepts for navigating life in exile: 1. Remember Who and Whose You Are The first step is remembering who you are and who you belong to. First Peter reminds us: "You are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation... Once you were not a people, but now you are God's people." Identity dictates behavior. While out with my five-year-old daughter, Zoe, I was playing the role of my usual goofy self—singing and dancing by the car. In a hushed, embarrassed tone, she whispered, "Dad, stop. We're at the store. Don't embarrass me." She later reminded me of a past tea party, saying, "You slurped tea at that tea party. That's not fancy. You need to be fancy." Zoe was highly attuned to identity and playing the part for the settings I’m in. She knew that the goofy dad needed to stay home so that the public shopping dad could take the spotlight. Observing her commitment to living into a specific role raises a challenging question: Do we have that same commitment to live into our identity in Christ? When we have a complete understanding of who we are because of Jesus, we live differently. Certain behaviors from the old life pass away because that is simply not who we are anymore. We are set apart, and set-apart people reject the darkness of past pain because what we hope for is what we live for. 2. Resist "Babylon" The second precept for living as a Christian in exile is to resist "Babylon"—the sinful aspects of the culture we face day to day. We are in the same situation as Daniel was in Babylon as Christians in an increasingly post-Christian society. In Daniel chapter one, the Babylonian empire asked Daniel and his friends to eat things that would go against their faith, defying God’s laws. While many others just went with the new culture fearing for their lives, Daniel and his friends refused to disobey. They asked for a few days to eat vegetables and fruits to obey God, and God honored their decision to remain faithful. They were healthier than the others as a result of their obedience. Resisting Babylon today goes against the grain. Babylon says it's about you and your convenience, but the kingdom of God says it's about sacrifice and laying down our life for our master Jesus. It means resisting the world's values—whether that means refusing to cheat on your taxes because others do, or staying committed to a marriage when it gets tough. Every breath is a second chance, and it is never too late to start again. 3. Represent the Kingdom of Christ Abstaining from a sinful culture is about what we don't do, but verse 12 moves into what we are meant to do: "Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God." It is not enough for us to resist evil; we have to promote the love, compassion, and forgiveness of Jesus Christ. Resisting Babylon is just cleaning house, but representing the holy nation of Christ is refurnishing. Simply abstaining from evil is meaningless if we do not partake in the holiness of Christ. In Luke chapter 11, Jesus warns that when an unclean spirit leaves a house and finds it swept and put in order but empty, it returns with seven other spirits more evil than itself. If we make room for Jesus but don't ask him to take residence in us, other things will take that empty space. We are challenged in 2 Corinthians 5:20 as ambassadors for Christ. We must ask ourselves: Are we serving others? Are our words becoming of an ambassador? Are we patient with difficult people? Do people see us as the church, living out what we hope for? Conclusion: Taking Spiritual Inventory Sometimes we just get a little too comfy here on earth, and we forget that we are just passing through. If we forget who and whose we are, we'll get lost. If we fail to resist Babylon, we will become like it. If we fail to represent God's kingdom, we won't be directing people to the hope we hold on to. There is a story of a man who got lost driving around. Refusing to ask for directions, he made his own custom turns and judgment calls. He approached a sign that said “Do Not Enter,” but because the road looked clear, he decided to go anyway. Things seemed fine until he came upon the back of a similar sign. It read: “Welcome back, stupid.” It was the back of the do not enter sign had ignored! He had the opportunity to change direction, but he didn't. Without Christ's directions, we too will find ourselves going around in circles. The Bible warns, "Be careful if you think you stand, lest you fall." Even as believers, we can drift off course and find ourselves tempted to live life in cahoots with Babylon. Take a spiritual inventory today and adjust your course. If you do not know where you stand in your faith, you can resist Babylon today, recognize you were made for the kingdom of God, and totally change the direction of your life. Being in exile means being different. What are you hoping for? Because what we hope for is what we live for. And hope promotes the defiant whimsy which says Christ has the final word of Love. And that is worth throwing some confetti for 🎉

Jonathan Grubbs

Associate Pastor